February 1999
Learning From Our Elders
by Janice Thompson
With all we know today, why do we still blanch at questions concerning the nature of love?
Clinical psychologists and authors, Kenneth R. Lakritz, Ph.D. and Thomas M. Knoblauch, Ph.D., believe that in our more recent history and for many reasons, the "expressions of love in our world have been shutting down. " None of the spiritual and philosophical literature they studied explained this and other baffling questions about the role of love in our society. After talking with their own mentors and advisors, the authors concluded that the answers may lie with our elders.
In our culture, the elderly are mostly regarded as remnants of once vital lives, now in emotional and intellectual decay. In their new book, Elders On Love: Dialogues on the Consciousness, Cultivation, and Expression of Love, Lakritz and Knoblauch set out to expose this assumption as a form of generational bias and shaire their refreshing discoveries about the state of love in our modern world. They point out that the elders of a community offer a precious perspective on spirituality, love, and, as Joseph Campbell describes it, "joy among the sorrows of life."
The authors engaged in a dialogue with seven "elders" from various backgrounds. This was not a cross-section of the population, but the elders they themselves knew and trusted. The majority of the participants in this project were trusted teachers, mentors and friends, including a medical doctor, a Guggenheim fellow, World War II veterans, a nurse, an architect, and a nun. They hold viewpoints rooted in science, medicine, and psychology as well as Judaism, Quakerism,Christianity, Catholicism, and Hinduism. Not saints or gurus, but simply people who have lived from 65 to 92 years, they have learned to cope with divorce, single-parenting, remarriage, alcoholism, and depression.
Lakritz and Knoblauch asked questions such as the following:
What is the true nature of love, and what do individuals need to do to nurture it in their lives?
How can we maintain an open, loving heart in the presence of evil, suffering, violence, and hatred?
What are the obstacles to an awareness and expression of love?
Their answers fill out a book that offers a new look at how growth and maturity — aging — cut through confusion in a fragmented world. They offer the aging baby-boomer generation a guide to fulfillment in the second half of life. To the youth of our society, they serve as a primer in the value of emotions and spirituality to cultivate a better future.
Elders On Love: Dialogues on the Consciousness, Cultivation, and Expression of Love, by Kenneth R. Lakritz, Ph.D., and Thomas M. Knoblauch, Ph.D.; foreword by Rabbi Zalman Schacter-Shalomi, author of From Age-ing to Sage-ing. Parabola, New York, NY. Hardcover and paperback; hardcover, 256 pages; $24.95; Release date: February 14, 1999. To order: 800-560-MYTH
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